Smoke Detector Strategy

Have you ever noticed that when smoke detectors start beeping they get harder to remove from the ceiling? I believe this is so you don’t remove them in the middle of a fire. “Oh wow it sure is hot and this smoke is literally killing me but that beeping is so annoying I think I’ll stop it. Honey, can you grab the ladder? Honey??”

Whenever a smoke detector goes off in my house I immediately move out.

I’ve moved 11 times in the past 10 years.

Live Cooking Commentary

I’ve been cooking a lot more this year than in the past. I’m enjoying it a lot. Sometimes when I cook I imagine that famous chefs are watching me and running a live commentary on what I’m doing.

Here are some excerpts:

“If I were cooking these eggs I’d whisk them like… oh that’s perfect. That’s exactly what I’d have done. Ohh yes.”

I’m really good at scrabbled eggs.

“Now here’s a tricky bit coming up. Within the next 15 seconds he must lower the temperature of the bottom side and drastically increase the temperature on the top. If he does not perform this action with absolute perfection the meal will be absolutely ruined. 5… 4… 3… 2… there he goes! Ohhhhhh he over rotated it and it landed on the side of the pan. What a disaster! That pancake will be a massive disappointment to whoever has to eat it.”

I certainly would’ve been disappointed if I’d had to eat it.

“It appears his 5-year-old has requested a pancake in the shape of a race car, but what a disappointment. What is that? It looks like a deformed minivan. Will the kid like it? Ohhhhh look at those tears. Huge tears. This is the moment. This is the moment he’ll look back on the rest of his life, the moment he realized that his dad is an absolute fraud.”

True story.

I don't want to write about technology

I’ve long had this idea in my head that this blog needed to be a space where I’d write about technology in order to advance my career, open up job opportunities, etc. But the fact is that writing about technology has never interested me much and, as a result, I’ve never written about it much.

I’d much rather write silly nonsense or post links to cool things I find.

So this is an official declaration that I’m no longer trying to make this a space for advancing my career in software engineering. This post is for myself to allow me to let go of this notion that this space was something it never has been.

Thanks for reading, all 3 of you. There’s more silly nonsense coming your way.