While preparing my talk on unhappiness at work I looked up old emails that related to the work situations I was going to be speaking about. Maybe things weren’t as bad as I remembered?

Nope. It was all worse.

One thing became very clear to me while reading those old work-related emails:

I ignored a lot of great advice from a variety of people, including those I specifically looked up to as mentors.

There were a number of people who were good at calling my bluff when I complained about work. They called me out. They told me I was being dumb. They told me not to act rashly. They were right about nearly everything and I ignored most of their advice.

I have gotten better at listening to these people. If they think I’m making a mistake at work, I try to listen. I still ignore good advice from time to time, but I’m proud to say that I ignore it less than I did before. Usually, my ego is the problem.

Find people who will call your bluff and not let you get away with anything. Don’t ignore them like I did. They may go away if you don’t listen.

Disclaimer: Some advice is crap. Some good advice may not apply to you at all and will just end being a distraction. Lots of advice will be layered with guilt, expectation, or selfishness. Figuring out the differences isn’t always fun.

Related: Realistic Role Models